There! With that click of the mouse, you've already taken a step to achieve a better life. You took action and sought information, both of which are vital to achieving a better life. This section shows you how to achieve the life you want, by setting goals, consistently taking action and forming behaviors that bring you closer to your goal until you reach it.
Before we start we must fill you in on some VERY IMPORTANT guidelines concerning human behavior and secrets for success. These guidelines as well as the steps we are about to explain to you can be applied to overcome any obstacle. This information is based on human behavior and the rules that govern life. The rules of human behavior do not apply only to one aspect of your life. They apply to all aspects of your life. And once you gain the skill to change one behavior to overcome one obstacle, you can use that skill to change other behaviors and to overcome other obstacles. The more you exercise this skill the better you will be at improving your life.
Make sure you understand these guidelines before moving on. In fact make sure you understand every section before moving on. This is a system. Every part depends on the rest of the system to work.
Exploring sources of information is an important step to achieving what you want out of life. One of the reasons humans have been able to accomplish such amazing achievements, is that we have recorded everything we've learned over thousands of years. A wealth of information is available in books, the Internet, educational programs, CD ROM, etc. Although it might have taken a lifetime of effort, trial and error by the person who discovered the information, it takes only reading, watching and listening for you to acquire the same knowledge. So once you set a goal. Get educated on the field. Any bit of knowledge can give you an edge. If you need to lose weight, read our section on weight control. If you're considering whether to quit a drug read the facts on that drug and on addiction under our drug section. Educating yourself is an ongoing process that lasts your whole life. It is a positive behavior that can help you reach your goals.
This is part of the education process. Find someone who has accomplished what you want to accomplish, and follow their example. Don't waste your time by "reinventing the wheel." Do some research. Find a role model. Study records of their life and how they reached their goal. If they're still around, get to know them and ask for their advice. Some people are flattered when asked for advice, and will feel good about helping you accomplish your goal.
Gain and maintain an empowering perspective. Perspective is for most people something they don't control. When they spill a bowl of chili on the white carpet they get furious. When someone keys their car they become irate. When someone dies of a disease, then their little problems don't seem so bad for a while. However, with just a little time, they may quickly slip back into their old perspective, screaming and punching the wall when they stub their toe.
If you want to take control of your life. You must gain control over your perspective, because your perspective controls your attitude. Whatever unfortunate event happens to you and whatever type of suffering you may experience, there is always an example of someone else who has suffered to the same degree or tremendously more and has emerged victorious. Acknowledging this, can make your experience seem a lot more manageable.
The golden rule: "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you." The part they forgot was, "because if you don't, they'll do unto you the crap that you've done unto everybody else!"
If you are a mean person, people won't feel bad about being mean to you. If you break the rules that your parents laid out, they will tighten their hold on your freedom. If you spread harmful gossip about others, they will not want to associate with you. If you treat others, their properties and their neighborhoods with no respect, then they will never treat you with respect.
Whether we like it or not, we interact with other people almost every single day of our lives. This is the result of the tightly pact population we live in. Because of this our daily experience is powerfully effected by the way others treat us. Human behavior ensures that they will treat us similarly to how we treat them or how they heard we treated someone else. Word gets around extremely quickly and reputations spread like wildfire because we are such a highly social species. Because of this, the people who survive and who do well are not the people who out-bully others. They are the people that are widely loved and respected; the people who get along with the rest of the population. Successful people are supported by the people around them because of the positive way they treat people in general. You might temporarily attract attention or improve your spot on the popularity totem pole at the expense of someone else. But, without exception, your actions will cause someone to return the favor to you. It's very simple. You can shape the actions of others toward you, by shaping your actions toward others.
If you understand this rule of life. You understand that you do have power. You understand that you don't have to be a victim. You can take action to positively influence your life. You can act a certain way to convince your parents to give you a little more freedom. You can act a certain way so that people will like your personality. You can act a certain way to convince your teacher to give you a better grade. Every action you make is an opportunity to induce positive support from the world around you. When you understand this and you recognize it throughout your day, you are in control of your life. You have one of the powers you need to succeed.
Please, take these points seriously. We do not mean
to tell you what to do. We are simply letting you know that life
works a certain way for all of us. Certain things work and certain
things don't. Now for a pep talk!